redjacketthief | 2nd Turn: [Video/Action]

[The video feed opens to a slightly manic grin on the face of the (in)famous thief, Arsene Lupin III. He is dressed in his usual attire of a brilliant red suit jacket and--mysteriously--is carrying a jitte that definitely does not belong to him. The only other thing that seems out of order is his hair which, although hastily shoved into place with the aid of water, appears intent on not staying in its usual slicked back style. That is not what draws the viewer's attention--it's the high energy, mischievous look in his eyes.

The camera wobbles slightly. He's at the fountain, and very obviously walking circles around the perimeter of it. He starts to speak, brandishing the jitte around as he makes his points.]

Good Morning, People of Luceti!! I've been here for a couple of weeks now, and I thought it was high time I made my official introduction to the rest of you. You may have heard mentions of me from a certain Sassy Little Kitten, Mine Fujiko, or from a certain determined Old Man, Inspector Zenigata Koichi--rest assured. I am here now. Any complaints you may have heard about me from them is now, from this day forward, thus alleviated.

Oh, but you'll be wanting my name, won't you? I am the One, the Only, Arsene Lupin III--international man of mischief and connoisseur of fine art and wine! Ladies, ladies. Take your time. You'll get your turn soon enough!

Now, now. Since we're all trapped in this place, and since I'm sure my reputation has preceeded me, feel free to contact me if you need a partner for a job or just someone to ease your lonliness. I may be a rogue, but I don't bite.

Hard.

[His tone hardens at this point, taking on an edge of knife-like severity. Underneath the mischief in his eyes lies a bold determination and aura of command.]

And, to any unseen and unheard audiences out there who may be listening in, I warn you: I won't stop at anything, I won't be quiet, and I won't make your job easy. I don't know what you were thinking in bringing me here, and I don't think I want to know. Keep in mind, though, that I'm very capable of making your lives miserable.

[He lets the words hang in the air for a lengthy beat, staring hard into the camera. Then, as quickly as it came, the mood vanished.]

Oh. Pops. I think I kinda grabbed your Jitte there. You can have it back when you want it--but I can see why you bring it around some times. It's pretty fun to wave around! [He grins like an idiot as he ends his announcement.]

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Yes, you're my Sassy Little Kitten!

[He laughs as he wonders if his kitten will bring out her claws.]

You wish~

[Maybe. But not immediately.]

Is that a challenge, Fujiko-chan?

[Two could play at that game.]

Would I do a thing like that? [Sugar-sweet playful tone, but with a natural edge for banter.]

Because you're a Sassy Little Kitten, of course! [He didn't fight the dumb grin or the giddiness in his voice--he loved these moments with Fujiko.]

You only say that because you're an annoying loud monkey.

Strange for a wolf, don't you think? [Would be sticking her tongue out at him, but since he can't see her anyway...]

[Ouch! There were the kitten's claws!]

That's mean, Fujikooooo! [He was whining now, like a puppy being chided for eating scraps from underneath the table.

Like a puppy, the wound on his pride didn't last long.]

But, but, Fujiko! Maybe I'm a Howler Monkey! Wolves howl--those monkey's howl--it fits!

[Okay there's a laugh at that.]

Okay, you can be a howler monkey then.

I still don't see why I'm a kitten though. Cats are creepy. [Except she totally is one. And wound up dressed as Catwoman before.]

Cats are also universally sexy, Fujiko. Ever hear the term 'sex kitten?'

[He didn't fight the laugh that bubbled out.] Though, a Howler Monkey and a Cat don't make for a very good pair...

I have~ [Purrs.] Still doesn't apply. [Clearly she's just being obstinate for the sake of it.]

Think they'd fight cats and dogs then?

They'd fight like mongooses and snakes, more like. [Or was it mongeese? Semantics, semantics.]

Then, what do you think fits best, Fujiko?

For little sassy me~?

I'm sure I don't know. [Hard to be an enigma if you go around telling people exactly what you think you are Lupin, gosh.]

I see, I see. [He's nodding sagely as he speaks, his tone, becoming momentarliy serious--even if it is an obviously hammy seriousness.]

Well, since you don't like kittens, would you prefer to be a Foxy Lady?

[Surely a fox suited her better!]

[Feline grin.]

I think I could live with that. [In other words, she loves it.]

I knew you'd come around!

...Now I have to wonder about Howler Monkeys and Foxes.

I bet they go on adventures together and the fox always tries to keep the shiny things and the howler monkey lets her. For the fun of it.

I think I know where this story is going, Fujiko. And the fox always comes back to the howler monkey, and they get along as if nothing has happened.

Right?

And the monkey messes up all of the foxes plans? Or at least most of them.

Yup, that sounds about right.

So mean...

[Lupin lets the word drag out before recovering his ego.]

But everything works out for the fox and the howler monkey in the end, though, so the messing up of plans is always forgiven.

[Perhaps with a kiss...? No, that was hoping for too much!]